I will not be hard
The past few weeks, I’ve been feeling an incredible sadness. I cannot quite put my finger on why or what’s been causing it, but it’s totally sucked.
There are times in my life when I feel stuck. Stuck where I am. Stuck in a rut. Stuck in a pile of low self-esteem. It’s really, really rough.
I’ve gone through this process several times since my senior year of high school. And I always seem to shake it until it randomly comes back up again.
This time, I’m going to try to shake it for good–not that being down is something wrong, because I don’t believe that feeling emotions is bad, ever–but why not be happy, ya know? We have the choice.
I’m already feeling a bit of senioritis, even thought I’m a junior in college. I can’t wait for summer. I’m constantly day-dreaming about the travels I’ll experience this summer–so many new places with people I love.
I had a deep heart to heart with my mom earlier this morning that really helped out. I am so blessed to have such a supportive and loving mom, dad, and step-dad. They are so wonderful.
So, from now, as of 12:05 on March 27, 2012, I will (try my very hardest to) live with a smile and not be hard. I will be soft. I will be open. I will be vulnerable, still, but only for the sake of letting people in.
My dad has always said (and I completely agree with him) that the relationships we have are the most important things in our lives.
I am done feeling stuck. I am going to make the best out of the situations thrown my way. I will make attainable goals. I will be kind to myself. I will love. I will love. I will love.
(Sorry if this post seemed to jump from one thing to another–I’m listening to some pretty great tunes on Spotify and I suppose I let the music take me away)
I met my new baby niece, Kate, this past weekend and took some newborn shots of her. I’ll share soon. I’ve also got some new features to get started on here.